Blood boils

Yes. I am hurting. Hurting so much that I can’t even tell you. I wish there was a way when I could have gotten details of what hurted you the most but I couldn’t. I couldn’t allow myself to let you expose to any hurt again at my expense. I shall rather act nonchalant to let you feel at home. I know their words were like cactus that pierced through your skin; discussing me infront of you wasn’t a moot point. They had to sting you in order to get back at me and the sole reason I let that happen was because they like me are part of your kin .They will talk no matter how good,worse, great or pathetic I seem to them.They always will so honey take a slow breath and don’t give a shit about their indecisiveness.

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Deal breaker

The worst, most memorable lessons learnt in life are from the ones who preach love. You may hear thousands of ways to learn but in a conquest to try ,you see the truth unfolding ; the very truth that those who feign guidance are the very ones who are at their worst form of debauchery. Even if it kills you deep inside to say something, you just can’t ,when what you say, just becames a mere interpretation of insensible.

Crescent Moon

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Moon outside – cinnamon colored
Stood straight focused on me
A reflection of my delusions
Disturbed from mirror image
Exhibited on the crescent moon
I felt frail keeping the malice hidden
Jilted in wounded pride
I succumbed to oblivion
Mute till the condemn storm died
Roiled in anxiety
Missing the one who strayed
For the last time that day
I peeked at the crescent moon
flamed ; reduced to thin smoke
Burned in lightest hues
Glitches on the crust
Moon rearview showed
A heart blotched to shreds
Fabricated in dust
Revealing stoned me.

Somewhere in conscious

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I was many things
A collection of pieces
Decorated to let you invade
Once unbridled in me
You stayed embedded
My affection- warm & uncanny
Mercilessly alluring
To a forbidden territory
Precepted as love
I was many things
Stinger to a core
Grieving aftermath
Endlessly till I healed
Zero immunity to faultless changes
If I were a ‘killjoy’
I would have let you suffer
What becomes opposite of platonic
Where sullen love was real
Hitting you hard
Somewhere in conscious
I was many things but
Player wasn’t one of them

Brutal hope

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Didn’t know relying on someone
Could get me in so much trouble.
To a point where it’s all pointless
Bickering, taunting ,cursing,
Gnawing, sniveling, scowling
Obstinacy had its own realm
Knocking me off my feet
If sugar talk could ignite disputes
Didn’t know which poison
Could acts as my referee.
Tears may acted as a catalyst
Still failed to win me an argument.
They say’ life is secondary’
Money was all worth a trouble.
Measuring it’s weigh among ton
Was like slapping redness all over myself.
If lives were such precious
Why did you spend third half ?
Of a life playing a pinch pocket
Like sand gripped in your fist
Falling no matter clutched tight
If balanced in your palm
It wouldn’t have dropped that easily
Damage done enlightened my sense
To believe difference b/w miser & thrifty
You did it all to antagonize me
To a point where hope seemed brutal.

Prominent!

Invisible shades of chaos
Greeting with happy songs
Euphemism in exaggeration
Jests to prolong obvious
Tip taps on the knee
Fidgety lapses of panic
Smile dead on lips
Phone inquiries
Hypothesis of your demeanor
Face reading grimaces
Eyes portraying reality-check
Whirlwind of niceties
Bickering here and there
Shrill whispers echoing
Temper struggles
In a vow to remain sheltered
Thy shadow became centre

White flag

Pain started subsiding me
Coercing my whole body
My soul descending from
Toes making its way out
Desperately gripping my heart
Shallow breathings turned minimal
My throat stuck together
Like acid burned inside
Words in my mouth murmuring
Vision- a hazardous headache
Legs & arms paralysed
Mouth opened in saliva foams
White flag above my head
I yeiled in to my death
Like cotton stuck in thorns
Ripped in shreds but free
I felt Inch by inch unraveled
Once a fine cotton
Now torn,
Disfigured – even gently picked
Soul bared to God
That’s how the end was.

Nightmare.

Sweat dripping from face
Hands shaking in denial
Body formed like tiny puddles
In middle of a dark forest
I found myself awake
Recognizable faces far
Silent chirping of birds
Grass overgrown & deadly
Toes scratched like dipped
In boil water
No pain to endure
Flinching with faltering steps
I backed away to dead end
Running from the beast
Striding with all might
His gaxe fixated to devour me
Galloping like a stallion
My demise ricocheting
Closing my eyes to surrender
I felt a wave of calmness
Awakening me to a sound
Of morning’s nightingale

Strange world

Strange world we live in.
Estranged get ass licked
Sweet get busted
Duped from the start
Every response stirs reaction
Even love sounds cliche
On a stroll to let others feel bad
Manipulations trick guilt
One Hell of days
synchronizing,roaring, jolting.
If space does good
It ends up torturing others.
Blasphemy once battered
Now direct maneuvering
fills up the bitter spot.
Disdain hidden from eyes
builts grudge inside.
Like the hell broke loose
mourning is just another ritual .
Maelstrom of ego
Wins another battle in
Housefull of weak.